LimericksInsanity!
by Loathsome Warg
Summary: Funny (well we think so) limericks we made up in theory class
1. Chapter 1

Menelmacar: Hey Tari, look! We finally got around to posting those limericks  
  
Taritalantie: Woohoo!  
  
M: um, yeah...  
  
T: Let's get to the bloody limericks already!  
  
M: Wait! We need a disclaimer first!  
  
Disclaimer: We, being the pathetic excuses for writers that we are, have not the imagination to come up with the Lord of the Rings characters.   
They solely belong to their rightful creator J.R.R. Tolkien who would probably think we were psychos for writing this.  
  
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Limericks/Insanity OR Limsanity!  
  


**Arwen:**  


There once was Arwen the maiden,   
With riches and gifts she was laden.   
She looked like an orc,   
And was quite a dork,   
But she captured poor Strider and laid 'im.  
  


**Legolas:**

There once was Legolas the fair,   
Blonde and long was his hair.   
He was very hot,   
Though Dwarf he was not,  
And his excellent vision was rare.  
  
  
**Gollum:**  
  
  
There once was Gollum the freak,   
Sam always called him a sneak.   
He wanted the Ring,   
And was stabbed by Sting,   
But he fell off of Mount Doom's peak.  
  


** Boromir:**

Boromir was not a strong man,   
When orcs attacked he ran.   
He escaped from the fray,   
For he was quite gay,   
So he changed his name to Anne.  
  


** Glorfindel:**

Glorfindel was rich in power,   
In danger he never did cower.   
Arwen stole his role,  
He had a new goal,   
To drown that bitch in the shower!  
  


**Aragorn:**

Aragorn was a North Ranger,   
Always in peril and danger.   
King of men,   
He lived in the fen,   
But his love for Arwen was stranger.  
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Menelmacar: HA! I changed that evil set up to this one. The one before on this page was driving me nuts seeing it.


	2. The return of the Limericks

Menelmacar: Yeah more lims are going to be uploaded.

Taritalantie: That's because you didn't upload them!   
  
M: Actually, Tari isn't here right now, so I'm just guessing what it supposed to be said. Anyways here are  
our new limericks. We are working on some other ones, but school is getting in the way of the creative   
process. Hopefully also this time they will upload properly.  
  
Disclaimer: We, being the pathetic excuses for writers that we are, have not the imagination to come up with the Lord of the rings Characters.  
They solely belong to their rightful creator J.R.R. Tolkien who would probably think we were psychos for writing this.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
**The return of the Limericks**  


**Sauron:**

Sauron was a big prick,  
His tower of torment was thick  
He had a big eye,  
He must have been high,  
When he gave elendil's ass a kick.

** Eomer:**

Eomer was a good rider,  
And was also friendly with Strider.  
Defended his king,  
with much honour to bring,  
And caught orcs in his web like a spider.

**Faramir:**

Faramir was very sad,   
He always thought fighting was bad.   
He was pierced in the side,   
They thought he had died,   
So he was nearly burnt by his dad!

Grima:

There once was Grima the worm,  
He always would whine and squirm.  
He was a big perv,  
And had so much nerve,  
To make everyone's stomach churn.

**Pip:**

There once was a hobbit named pip,  
The Uruk hai gave him the whip.  
Fool of a Took,  
He wanted a look,  
And thankfully gave Sauron the slip.


	3. Attack of the Limericks

Menelmacar: So not tired. SO very, very awake.   
  
**Taritalantie:** ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...  
  
Tari: What? Huh? *wakes up*  
  
Menel: At least one of us can sleep.  
  
Tari: Hey we finally got around to making some more limericks!  
  
Menel: Yay!! Unfortunately the site is down so I woke up early for nothing.  
  
Tari: Aw too bad for Menel. Too much new year's parting, huh?  
  
Menel: Don't remind me! *shudder*   
  
Tari: Anywho ..... Lets go get to the limericks! I heard they're ESPECIALLY funny this time ..... or maybe it was just a rumour?  
  
Menel: *raises eyebrow* right.   
**   
Disclaimer: We, being the pathetic excuses for writers that we are, have not the imagination to come up with the Lord of the rings Characters.  
They solely belong to their rightful creator J.R.R. Tolkien who would probably think we were psychos for writing this.  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

** Attack of the Limericks **

Eowyn:

Eowyn was good with a sword,  
But was always tired and bored.  
She dressed like a man,  
All her enemies ran,  
When she turned from lady to lord.

Dernhelm rode down into war,  
His hair was brighter than ore.  
He was really a girl,  
Gave the witch king a whirl,  
And married a man fluent in lore**  
  
**

Elrond:

Elrond half-elven took trips,  
To visit Cirdan and his ships.  
He was very old,  
But was very bold,  
And in the movie wore butterfly clips

**Treebeard:**

Treebeard caused Saruman's doom,  
With many a hom and a hoom.  
He was a great ent,  
Orthanc he did dent,  
Never hasty, did nothing too soon.  
  


**Gimli**

Gimli was honest and fair,  
Of elves he really did care.  
He wielded an axe,  
Killed orcs to the max,  
And coveted Galadriel's hair.


	4. The Fellowship of the Limericks

Menelmacar: NO! The site is down. And I have to go to school soon. I might as well edit the limericks and save it, so I can post later. Tari is probably  
already at school. Eep! Must rush! Must finish studying physics!   
  
  
**   
Disclaimer: We, being the pathetic excuses for writers that we are, have not the imagination to come up with the Lord of the rings Characters.  
They solely belong to their rightful creator J.R.R. Tolkien who would probably think we were psychos for writing this.  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

**The Fellowship of the Limericks**

**Aragorn:**

Aragorn, Elessar was king,  
In elvish he really could sing.  
He had many names,  
And as many dames,  
And wore Barahir's cool funky ring.  
  


**Boromir:**

Boromir was loud and gaudy,  
Yet also was quite the hottie.  
He had no wife,  
And risked his life,  
To have Aragorn loot his dead body.  
(come on in the movie he stole his gauntlets!)**  
  
**

**Gandalf:**

Gandalf was one of the wise,  
But a Balrog caused his demise.  
Came back in white,  
And led the fight,  
But pipe weed caused most of his highs.  
  


**Gimli:**

Gimli the dwarf was short,  
Yet of a quite different sort.  
Orc necks he did hew,  
Quite many, not few  
When he gave Sauron's minions a thwart.  
  


**Merry:**

There once was a hobbit named Merry,  
Who led the rest to buckleberry ferry.  
Was Frodo's friend,   
His aid he did lend,  
And a sword of the west he did carry.  
  


**Pippin:**

Pippin at times was a fool,  
But he also was funny and cool.   
He looked in the stone,  
Which caused Gandalf to moan,  
So pip became Denethor's tool.  
  


**Sam:**

There once was Samwise the Brave,  
Frodo, many times did he save.  
He had lots of kids,  
To Frodo he bids  
Farewell, since he went over the wave.

**Frodo:**

Frodo once lived in the Shire.  
Sam as his slave he did hire.  
Got stabbed by a wraith,  
But had Gandalf's faith,  
To throw that damn ring in the fire.

**Legolas:**

Legolas was very well read,  
But sadly, was never to wed.  
Shot arrows with skill,  
Orc guts he did spill   
And wasn't afraid of the dead.

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Menel: HA! There we go. Now I have to go back to studying Physics, oh joy and rapture. 


	5. Four elves, a wraith and a pizza place

**Menelmacar: **Waiting, waiting for Tari to tell me what to write. I could always fake and be tari.   
  
**Taritalantie: **Wait, No ! I'm awake!

Menel: Never mind then. Well Tari is going to make a little speech right now. I'm too tired to from let's just say diplomatic negotiating.

Tari: Thanks to alllllll our reviewers and people who read (and hopefully laughed at) our limericks!

Menel: What a wonderful speech...

Tari: Thanks!

Menel: On with the limericks!

Tari: Yay! (grrr exams are coming {Menel: well they are kind of here} so we might not be able to post for w while.)

Menel: Boooo, exams interfering in our limerick time!

Tari: Oh don't worry they're only for a week! After that we'll have plenty of limerick writing time!

Disclaimer: We, being the pathetic excuses for writers that we are, have not the imagination to come up with the Lord of the rings Characters.  
They solely belong to their rightful creator J.R.R. Tolkien who would probably think we were psychos for writing this.

_**__________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
**

**Four elves, a wraith and a pizza place**

**Celeborn:**

Celeborn had a bit of an itch,  
To be more important and rich.   
He tried very hard,  
And though on his guard,  
Ended up being Galadriel's bitch.

**Haldir:**

Haldir had many a whim,  
An elf, tall, slender and slim.**  
**Climb trees he could,  
But the lady of the wood,  
Was nobody else but him.

**Galadriel:**  
  
Galadriel was one freaky lady,  
Men always thought her quite shady.  
Held one of the three,  
She lived in a tree,  
And her hair was long, blonde and braidy.

**Cirdan:**

Cirdan stood at long at his haven,  
Yet in the movie was cleanly well shaven.  
He guarded the gate,  
For a very cheap rate,  
And elf behinds for years he's been savin'.

**Wraith:**

There once was wraith number nine,  
He never did anything fine.  
Was living, yet dead,  
Arwen he did wed,  
Yet only in this small, little rhyme.

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End file.
